Do you love those Christmas movies where the high-powered executive lady moves to a small town temporarily for business and meets a handsome salt-of-the-earth lumberjack/farmer/mayor/baker? Do you love it when he shows her the true meaning of Christmas and she saves the town by donating an exorbitant sum to the town’s Christmas parade? And don’t you just love it when she leaves her home and dream job for a man she barely knows and a town that probably doesn’t have Internet?
Or do you like good Christmas movies? If you do prefer good Christmas movies, then do I have the list for you!
This comprehensive list will help you figure out which movie will fill you with the holiday spirit. Don’t forget to check your moon and rising signs.
But if you do like the classic cheesy Christmas rom-com, then you should check out this hilarious parody.
Aries – A Christmas Story
Written and directed by Bob Clark. Co-written by Jean Shepherd and Leigh Brown. Based on the story by Jean Shepherd
Not many people may realize this, but Aries’ are sanguine softies who only lose their cool when mercilessly provoked. That’s why Ralphie, a boy who dreams of protecting his family with a BB Gun and then beats up a cruel bully will resonate so well with them.
Notable film quotes Aries will love:
“Daddy’s gonna’ kill Ralphie!”
“You’ll shoot your eye out!”
Taurus – The Holiday
Written and directed by Nancy Meyers.
Taurus is ruled by Venus, so naturally, they are paired up with one of the most romantic movies on the list. The earth sign will fall in love with the cozy aesthetic and the tender dialogue. They will also appreciate the empowering message of self-worth.
Notable film quotes Taurus will love:
“You’re supposed to be the leading lady in your own life for god’s sake!”
“It’s Christmas Eve and we are going to celebrate being young and being alive.”
“If you were a melody…I used only the good notes.”
Gemini – The Santa Clause
Written by Leo Benvenuti and Steve Rudnick. Directed by John Pasquin.
Kind-hearted Geminis will sympathize with this film’s main character, Scott Calvin. Scott mirrors the air sign’s dualistic nature when he is forced to assume the role of Santa while simultaneously fulfilling his role as a father.
Notable quotes Geminis will love:
“Kids don’t need to see this place to know it’s real.”
“Can we take a direct flight back to reality, or do we have to change planes in Denver?”
“Do you want this doll or not? Go back to sleep.”
Cancer – It’s a Wonderful Life
Written and directed by Frank Capra. Co-written by Frances Goodrich and Albert Hackett.
George Bailey’s compassion will appeal to Cancer’s heightened sense of empathy. This film about a man’s unshakeable devotion to his family and community will fill the moon children with the Christmas Spirit.
Notable quotes Cancerians will love:
“Every time a bell rings, an angel gets his wings.”
“Remember, no man is a failure who has friends.”
“Strange, isn’t it? Each man’s life touches so many other lives. And when he isn’t around he leaves an awful hole, doesn’t he?”
Leo – White Christmas
Written by Norman Krasna, Norman Panama, and Melvin Frank. Directed by Michael Curtis
This Christmas classic about romance and showbiz is perfect for our theatrical lion. The rousing musical numbers, fantastic costumes, and breathtaking set design will have all of the Leo’s dreaming of a White Christmas.
Notable film quotes Leos will love:
“Now the crooner is becoming the comic.”
“Lord help the mister who comes between me and my sister and Lord help the sister who comes between me and my man.”
“Don’t you think we ought to kiss or something?”
Virgo – Miracle on 34th Street
Written and directed by Maureen O’Hara and John Payne
Yes Virgo, there is a Santa Claus! This heartwarming tale of Kris Kringle convincing a no-nonsense woman and her precocious daughter to believe in Santa will speak to the logical and pragmatic Virgo.
Notable film quotes Virgos will love:
“Look Doris, someday you’re going to find that your way of facing this realistic world just doesn’t work. And when you do, don’t overlook those lovely intangibles. You’ll discover those are the only things that are worthwhile.”
“I believe…I believe…. It’s silly, but I believe.”
“Faith is believing in things when common sense tells you not to.”
Libra – The Happiest Season
Written and directed by Clea DuVall. Co-written by Mary Holland.
Like Taurus, Libra is also ruled by the planet of romance and adoration, so it only makes sense to pair them with another holiday romance. Libra’s will instantly empathize with the main characters’ plight of trying to maintain familial peace.
Notable film quotes Libra will love:
“I am scared to tell them who I am, I will lose them. And I know if I don’t tell them, I will lose you.”
“Come on guys, just hug it out.”
“I left a gentleman in my apartment so I’m tracking him to make sure he leaves.I track everyone. If the NSA can do it, so can I.”
Scorpio – The Nightmare Before Christmas
Written by Tim Burton and Caroline Thompson. Directed by Henry Selick
Never make a Scorpio choose between Halloween and Christmas. Underneath their broody exterior lies a child-like wonderment that revels in the joy that the holiday season brings. Enjoy this holiday classic, but please don’t kidnap the Sandy Claws!
Notable film quotes Scorpio will love:
“I’m a master of fright, and a demon of light, and I’ll scare you right out of your pants.”
“And on a dark cold night, under full moonlight, he flies into the fog like a vulture in the sky!”
“I could conquer the world with one hand, as long as you’re holding the other.”
Sagittarius – Home Alone
Written by John Hughes. Directed by Chris Columbus.
Sagittarius gets two movies! Kevin McCallister must be a Sagittarius with his ambition, innovation, and his remarkable ability to intimidate the Wet Bandits. The mutable fire sign will enjoy the film’s fun hijinks, but they will appreciate how the film touches on the importance of family and togetherness. They will also love the sequel because Kevin gets to travel and Sagittarians are all about travel.
Notable film quotes Sagittarius will love:
“Did I burn down the joint? I don’t think so. I was making ornaments out of fishhooks.”
“Guys! I’m eating junk and watching rubbish. You better come out and stop me!”
“Yikes! I did it again! Oh no! My family’s in Florida and I’m in New York…my family’s in Florida and I’m in…New York!”
Capricorn – Scrooged
Written by Mitch Glazer and Michael O’Donoghue. Richard Donner.
Capricorns will love to hate the film’s self-important yet charismatic protagonist, Frank Cross. They will simultaneously applaud Frank’s business sense while cheering on his emotional growth throughout the movie.
Notable film quotes Capricorn will love:
I get it. You’re here to show me my past, and I’m supposed to get all dully-eyed and mushy. Well, forget it, pal, you got the wrong guy!
That’s exactly what Attila the Hun said. But when he saw his mother… Niagara Falls!
Sometimes, you have to SLAP them in the face just to get their attention!
Aquarius – How the Grinch Stole Christmas
Written by Jeffrey Price and Peter S. Seaman. Directed by Ron Howard. Based on the story by Dr. Seuss
Aquarians will love this movie because they can identify with the film’s non-conforming titular character. They will also appreciate the importance the movie places on goodwill and charity over commercialism and materialism.
Notable film quotes Aquarius will love:
“One man’s toxic sludge is another man’s potpourri.”
“4:00, wallow in self-pity. 4:30, stare into the abyss. 5:00, solve world hunger, tell no one. 5:30, jazzercize; 6:30, dinner with me. I can’t cancel that again. 7:00, wrestle with my self-loathing. I’m booked. Of course, if I bump the loathing to 9, I could still be done in time to lay in bed, stare at the ceiling and slip slowly into madness. But what would I wear?”
“I don’t need anything more for Christmas than this right here. My family.”
Pisces – A Muppet Christmas Carol
Written by Jerry Juhl and directed by Brian Henson. Based on the story by Charles Dickens
This movie will appeal to Pisces’ sentimental nature and love for nostalgia. They will giggle at Gonzo and Rizzo’s antics. And they will cry happy tears as they watch Ebenezer’s transformation from a miserly old coot to an empathetic philanthropist. Also, Pisces have the emotional maturity to handle the unfairly cut song “When Love is Gone.”
Notable film quotes Pisces will love:
“Should we be worried about the kids in the audience?” “Nah, it’s alright. This is culture.”
“I told you, storytellers are omniscient. I know everything!” “Hoity-Toity, Mr. Godlike-Smarty-Pants.”
“Light the lamp, not the rat! Light the lamp, not the rat!”
Ophiuchus – Die Hard
Written by Jeb Stuart and Steven E. de Souza. Directed by John McTiernan. Based on the novel Nothing Lasts Forever by Roderick Thorpe
Have you ever heard of the 13th zodiac sign? If not, don’t worry about it. But if so, just know that Ophiuchus should watch Die Hard because they are not a real sign and Die Hard is not a real Christmas movie! [Editor’s note: And she’s willing to die on this hill.]
The one quote everyone loves:
“Yippie-Ki-Yay… Mutton Farmer!”
I hope you enjoy these wonderful holiday classics and I hope you have a magical holiday season!